A follow-up + explanation
Last week I wrote a post out of an overwhelming sense of grief over a young life cut short.
A little too quickly for me, it had so many views, I wasn’t sure what to do. I saw the stats on my blog, the messages in my email inbox, and the kind words and prayers my friends and family offered up and I did what any logical person would do – I shut my computer down and turned off my phone because I was emotional and grieving and I didn’t quite know how to handle the response.
One of my colleagues suggested that I not write about her death on the internet, and so, with a sense of relief, I hid the post.
Now that I am a little less drained, I thought I would offer up an explanation on why I took down something that had obviously struck a cord with people and motivated such a beautiful response…
1 – we don’t have all the details on her death, and there is no way to control who will read the post.
2 – there is always fine line that I am not always sure how to walk when it comes to telling someone else’s story. I felt so strongly that the story of this girl should be told, but the truth is, I don’t always know if I am the one to tell it. Or if now is the time.
3 – it was suggested that people may read the post, feel sad, tell me how great I am for doing this work, and then move on. Consumer sadness. This is a hard one to swallow. And not my intention in sharing my utter devastation over the loss of a life. My motivation was not to receive a pat on the back. It was simply to share the burden of sadness and hope that someone would care that a girl had lived and died and that it.is.not.right.
There are not enough words to tell all the stories of what we have seen in the world of sexual exploitation. I do not always have enough wisdom in how to express these stories. I write because it is how I process, but I long to be cautious in that processing. So for the sake of playing it safe I have kept things private.
But in the meantime, I want to say I am so incredibly grateful to those of you who did read it, who shared in our grief, who expressed sadness, and who honoured her journey. Your kind words and prayers are treasures that proved to me the one point I was trying to make, that her story mattered.